What Parents of Second Babies Really Need
A baby shower is one of the nicest ways for new parents to acquire the items that they need to have a smooth start to parenthood. It is also a wonderful way for family and friends to show their love and support. In the past, it was often viewed as improper to hold a shower for a second child, seeing as the parents were not likely to need much, especially the “big” items. However, it is no longer improper to hold a shower for a second baby, as long as you make a few adjustments.
You could make it an essentials-only shower, asking guests to bring items that are always needed, such as bottles (the nipples always wear out or get lost), diapers and wet wipes, and burp cloths. You can add to the gift registry those items which the parents did not receive with their first baby. Another option is to make it a shower for mom instead of a shower for the baby, and ask the guests to bring items that mom will need and appreciate at the end of her pregnancy and shortly after the birth. She’ll appreciate receiving something soothing like aromatherapy candles, or even something for day-to-day use, like a soft robe.
Another great idea is to have a mom-focused shower – but reminding her that she’s not just a mom, with gifts that are for her alone, like romantic perfume or a bit of sexy (supporting!) lingerie. Obviously mom and dad will need some time for themselves, so a nice idea might be to get a gift certificate for an elegant dinner – with babysitting included, of course. Another option may be to sit down with the guests and the father before the party and make up a calendar (use a dry-erase version) with helping-out offers.
You might want to arrange for someone to clean house while mom and baby are still in the hospital, helping out with childcare or as a helper on errands or grocery day, or schedule transportation for the older child’s school and sports activities, especially the first week or so. The finished calendar, with names and phone numbers in case of adjustments, can be presented to mom at the shower. In some cases, both mom and baby are set, and don’t need anything new. Or, consider having a simple party, featuring good food, music, and the mom’s loved ones.
You could ask the guests to buy baby items, smaller items like diapers and clothing, and then bring them to donate to a women’s charity or shelter. Another fun way to organize a shower for a second baby is to have a “freezer party” where guests bring dishes that can be frozen or otherwise easily stored. This will definitely help out mom in the last days before her due date and also those following the birth. Obviously, you’ll want to check with mom to see if she has adequate room in her freezer for al the goodies, as well as select a party date close to her delivery date.
Lastly, if the new baby is what is often known as a caboose baby (several years younger than the next brother or sister), you can still hold a full baby shower. Many times even the “big” items will no longer be around, or will need safety updates, so mom and dad will appreciate all the help they can get.
Regardless of the type of shower you are holding or if the gifts are large or small, remember that you are there to let the mom know that she and her new baby have all your love and support.
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